barbara walters just said penis...
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
