What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
