You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize