he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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