Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
