Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
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