party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
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