it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
