So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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