So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Randomize
