but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize
