Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Randomize
