If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
