if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
