happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
