i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
