Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
