i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
