I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Randomize
