dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
