Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
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