biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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