Sponge bath it is.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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