Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
