Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
