seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
