Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
