Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
