i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
