We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize