Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
