We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
He? As in you personified your dick?
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
