can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
