Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"

  (616): View more from Michigan

  He did it well too

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  (616): His pickup line was "I'll eat you out" (616): He did it well too http://tfl.nu/h6lm
  Replies (57) Good night (9015) Bad night (856)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?

  (1-805): View more from California

  Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit

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  (805): I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!? (1-805): Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit http://tfl.nu/hqm2
  Replies (23) Good night (611) Bad night (2294)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.

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  (701): The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night. http://tfl.nu/22ub
  Replies (12) Good night (933) Bad night (3782)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...

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  (708): For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night... http://tfl.nu/rl66
  Replies (9) Good night (3439) Bad night (913)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.

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  (916): It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her. http://tfl.nu/zc22
  Replies (25) Good night (1375) Bad night (4871)
• Favorite

  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.

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  (709): I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her. http://tfl.nu/w26o
  Replies (10) Good night (2224) Bad night (1199)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.

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  (410): I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb. http://tfl.nu/3y7t
  Replies (3) Good night (1799) Bad night (768)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?

  (1-701): View more from North Dakota

  No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"

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  (701): Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..? (1-701): No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup" http://tfl.nu/9q23
  Replies (1) Good night (1800) Bad night (954)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..

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  (503): He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long.. http://tfl.nu/2c8x
  Replies (4) Good night (1379) Bad night (536)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma

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  (512): I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma http://tfl.nu/4ovd
  Replies (12) Good night (1161) Bad night (1784)
• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.

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  (636): Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome. http://tfl.nu/7z1r
  Replies (4) Good night (1261) Bad night (880)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice

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  (920): I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice http://tfl.nu/vmg8
  Replies (5) Good night (989) Bad night (730)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Wait does semen show up on blood tests?

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  (832): Wait does semen show up on blood tests? http://tfl.nu/pugn
  Replies (26) Good night (637) Bad night (1296)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well

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  (832): Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well http://tfl.nu/k7w9
  Replies (1) Good night (450) Bad night (570)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.

  (1-608): View more from Wisconsin

  Sex is clearly the solution either way.

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  (608): Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored. (1-608): Sex is clearly the solution either way. http://tfl.nu/07hm
  Replies (2) Good night (1321) Bad night (522)

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