Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(530): View more from California

1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.

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(601): View more from Mississippi

Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.

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(301): View more from Maryland

There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself

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(404): View more from Georgia

I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(626): View more from California

Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.

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(281): View more from Texas

Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?

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(270): View more from Kentucky

Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.

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(925): View more from California

What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants

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