You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize
