I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Randomize
