what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Randomize