I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
