wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize
