I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
