do herpes really smell.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Randomize