If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize
