Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
"it" just moved
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Randomize
