She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
