Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
