the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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