people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
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