Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
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