it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
she peed on how many people?
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
