My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize