Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
